Going by past performances – of which there have been many, today should progress like this:
1. Smiling and nodding Euromuppets announce latest breakthrough in efforts to save the unsaveable Euro, amidst great back slapping and mutual congratulations all round.
2. Markets dance the Dead Cat Bounce, reach new highs since last solution to the crisis.
3. Euphoria gives way to caution, caution gives way to suspicion and suspicion gives way to the realisation that it’s all bollocks – again.
4. Markets settle back, and Euromuppets announce a new summit in a month’s time, to include photographs, lovely dinners and high profile press conferences.